Podcast Review: Dying for Sex. Why Molly Kochan’s journey of sexual healing is the podcast you need to listen to now.

Podcast Review: Dying for Sex. Why Molly Kochan’s journey of sexual healing is the podcast you need to listen to now.

. 4 min read

Dying for Sex just won a well-deserved Ambie for Best Podcast of the Year. Here's the review we published in March on this provacative series.

Sexual Healing*

Molly Kochan is a 44 year old heteronormative married woman living in LA who leaves a controlling husband, begins having wide-ranging sexual escapades and starts a podcast with her best friend Nikki Boyer to share the stories.  Molly is funny, introspective, empathetic, creative, unguarded, curious, unnervingly honest, enchanting.  And always "looking" (as they'd say on Grindr).  She is eager for all of the experiences, including just about anyone else's kinks.  Molly and Nikki's podcast gives us an intimate introduction to Molly's sexcapades, revealing a lot about this whole being human thing.  There is a surprise happy ending that ignites Molly's journey, some fetish play, some BDSM, and a lot of frank and humorous talk about it all.  One thing that makes the sexual carnival relatable and poignant is where the encounters take place.  Not in the sex clubs, dungeons and designated play rooms of erotic fantasy, but in the ordinary spots in Molly's life:  a bath tub, the back seat of a Toyota Corolla, a bed in an ICU.  

Why an ICU?  Because Molly has Stage 4 metastatic breast cancer.  When we meet Molly she has anywhere from a day to five years to live.  We learn that at the point when she receives the terminal diagnosis, her marriage hadn't been working on any front for a while. With the diagnosis came the news that she could never bear children, so the cancer, according to Molly, changed her as a woman. "It makes you feel sexually irrelevant." But "sex is about life, and it's about creation. So it counters death in so many ways".  After the diagnosis she tells her husband, "I really really need to be feminized and sexualized."  It is when they realize that he isn't able to do that that Molly's journey begins.

Sex for Molly is more than an antidote to death, though.  It is only toward the end of the six episodes that we start to figure out that Molly's sex trek is how she becomes whole, and why she needs to.  Her lively sexual encounters, we realize, are the stage on which Molly has chosen to express her abundant creativity, the stage where she finally receives the attention she needs and has sought for a lifetime, where she finally finds true intimacy with men, discovers and communicates her boundaries, and ultimately transcends from mere actor to playwright of the story of her life.  Molly is open to sharing in so many other's kinks and stories,  and I often wondered about hers or how much of herself she was revealing to her many sexual partners (like her condition).  I was glad that these areas got addressed in the end, but I wanted more here.  

It is only toward the end of the six episodes that we start to figure out that Molly's sex trek is how she becomes whole, and why she needs to.  Her lively sexual encounters, we realize, are the stage on which Molly has chosen to express her abundant creativity, the stage where she finally receives the attention she needs and has sought for a lifetime, where she finally finds true intimacy with men, discovers and communicates her boundaries, and ultimately transcends from mere actor to playwright of the story of her life.  Molly is open to sharing in so many other's kinks and stories,  and I often wondered about hers or how much of herself she was revealing to her many sexual partners (like her condition).  I was glad that these areas got addressed in the end, but I wanted more here.  

The friendship between Molly and Nikki (and its complicated beginning) is a love story as animating as any romance.  Molly and Nikki's  podcast, Dying for Sex, is so many things - it is about how you face off with death, the primacy of longstanding friendships, the beauty and significance of even passing intimate connections.  More than anything else though, it is about the power and healing of a woman through her sexual awakening.  

Sound pretty dramatic?  It is.  I binged it like a can of Pringles.  Listening to Molly's story gives a titillating glimpse into a very real but foreign world (to me).  While that alone is worth the listen, more powerful was the reminder to remain open and check my judgment of others, to focus with earnestness on my own path to wellness and wholeness, and mostly for its urgent call to become the author of my own life story.  Today.

Listen to Dying for Sex here.

The Crush Letter
The Crush Letter is a weekly newsletter from Dish Stanley curating articles & intelligence on everything love & connection - friendship, romance, self-love, sex. If you’d like to take a look at some of our best stories go to Read Us. Want the Dish?



Tags

"Divorce, Baby, Divorce" by Liza Lentini "Don't Touch My Hat.*" Midlife Men & Loneliness "This is a Tale of Modern Love ..." 5 Great Boutique Hotels Around NYC. By Jeanne Bosse 5 things that turn our crush readers on A Book That Could Unf*ck Your Relationship: I Want This To Work By Elizabeth Earnshaw. Reviewed By Angela Kempf. A Circle of Crones. By Elayne Clift A Roman Love Affair. By Lady Verity A Truly Good Thing. By Dish Stanley A Turntable and a Candle: F-ing Classics About Face: Skincare Essentials for Men Amplify! Sex with Emily: The 12 Episodes CRUSH Readers Should Get on Top of An Upbeat Playlist for the Divorce-curious And I Wondered ... Do We Really Need A SATC Reboot? And Just Like That... Who Are These People?? By Jeanne Bosse Another brother gained and lost. By Jeanne Bosse Bedtime Rituals for Couples. By :auren D. Weinstein Bisexually Anxious Among the Noodges. Review: shiva Baby Bloody Good Sex Book Review: A Certain Hunger by Chelsea G. Summers Book Review: Norma Kamali: I Am Invincible Book Review: Swan Dive: The Making of a Rogue Ballerina by Georgina Pazcoguins. Reviewed By Lady Varity Book Review: The Confidence Game: Why We Fall For It Every Time By Maria Konnikova' Book Review: The Lover. By Marguerite Duras. Book Review: The Story of O CRUSH Summer Reading List! From CRUSH Reader Sharon Weinberg, Owner of The Chatham Bookstore Dear Dish DEVOUR {things to do, have & know about} Dish Gets A Kink Assessment. Doing Nothing With Friends Effortless, Natural Holiday Makeup. By Lauren D. Weinstein Extended Encounters. By Lisa Ellex F*ck Songs. Three Best Jazz Albums for a Sexy Night In. By Lisa Ellex Five Best Jazz Clubs Around The Country. By Lisa Ellex Foria's Totally Useful Guide to Sexting Four Indie Bookstore That Stayed In My Life Long After I Left Town. By Dish Stanley French Kiss: French Girls Do It Better, Right? Girl Crush. By Lady Verity Grief. By Lauren D. Weinstein Heard It at The Grammys: Dishs Crush on Silk Sonic Hefner. By Bob Guccione, Jr Hide A Love Note In Their Pocket. Holiday Perspectives. By Dean Christopher Hook Ups Hot Thots How to Be the Most Charming Person at a Holiday Party. By Evie Arnaude I just turned 60 but I feel 22 I'm Dish, the Master of Ceremonies Kathy: This Is A Love Story About Three Friends Lamentations on the Lost Art of Kissing. By Elisabeth C. Lamotte Leave the husband, bring the cannoli. By A.K.A. Darla Let's Reconsider, with Adam Grant Love & Mike's "Bad Girl Pasta" Love/Sex/Moon Magick By Lynn Eaton Melissa Biggs Bradley's New Book Safari Style Makes Me Want To Go On A Safari MIDLIFE CRISIS: When Reality Strikes, By Dean Christopher Movie Magic. By Amy Ferris My First Solo Trip: Mexico, Part I. By Dawn Larsen Naked & Not afraid by KC Roth Nice to Meet You. How Are You Crazy? Oasis in the Desert. One woman's honest journey through vaginal rejuvenation. OMG Yes. Pillow Tawk (or NOT)? Play well with others. By Dish Stanley Playing Games: A Review of Esther Perel's New Sold Out Card Game. Podcast Review: Dying for Sex. Why You Need to Listen to Molly's Journey. PrimeCrush & Chill: The Hottest Thing to Watch Right Now Is A 1968. French Psychodrama "La Piscine" PrimeCrush Cocktail Coaster Giveaway! QUIVER. Sexual Debut Stories. Red Flags Reports from the edge. By Jane Boon Sexual Frustrations. By Elisabeth C Lamotte Shameless Quick & Easy Mac & Cheese. By Evie Arnaude Sighs & Moans. By Ralph Greco SIP. Best Lines from the Double Dates Podcast Hosted by Marlo Thomas & Phil Donahue Six Ways to Get the Friends Who Count Snapshot Rec: Get Yourself Sexify-ed on Netflix. Snapshot Rec: Read Liza Lentini on the Indigo Girls in SPIN Solo in my Sixties. By Jeanne Bosse Songs That Make You Wanna F*ck. Stanley Tucci Is Paradise Stories to Read Aloud to a Lover. By A.K.A. Darla Tell Me More. By Dish Stanley The 3 Things You're Really Fighting About The 4 Most Common Skincare Issues for Men (But Were Afraid to Ask). By Lauren D. Weinstein The Crush Letter 44 The Crush Letter 51: DEVOUR The Crush Letter 58 The Crush Letter Its a tune The Crush Letter No 33 The Crush letter No 36 The Crush Letter No 39 The Crush Letter No 40 The Crush Letter No 41: DEVOUR The Crush Letter No 42 The Crush Letter No 43 The Crush Letter No 45 The Crush Letter No 53 The Crush Letter No 54 The Crush Letter No 55 The Crush Letter No 56 DEVOUR The Crush Letter No 57 The Crush Letter No 59 The Crush Letter No 60: DEVOUR The Crush Letter No 61 The Crush Letter No 62 the crush letter no 63 The Crush Letter No 64 The Crush Letter No 65: DEVOUR The Crush Letter No 66 The Crush Letter No 67 The Crush Letter No 68 The Dynamics of Friendhip By Lauren D. Weinstein The Friendship Files By AKA Darla The Hole. By Kiva Schuler The Holiday Anti-Checklist By Liza Lentini The Perfect Snowy Saturday. By Jeanne Bosse The Ritual of Comforts. By Lady Verity Thee Timeless Travel Books. By Bob Guccione Jr. Things To Let Go Of. By Dish Stanley To get all of us, subscribe. Treats: A Sex Toy Tester Update Under The Radar Series. By Dish Stanley Who Are CRUSH Readers Grateful For? You're My Medicine You're Wearing A Turtleneck, Again? Your Big Green Heart. By Liza Lentini Your Love Is King & Queen, GQ Zoning Out in Comfort. By Dean Christopher