The Crush Letter brings love to your inbox weekly on Saturdays. To make you, your weekend — and sometimes even your love life — more compelling. Hell yes, sign me up.
Hello Crush,
Thanks for being here. I love having you as a CRUSH Reader.
I hope that your summer is off to an auspicious start. I spent the first long week end of the season headed into the widely-publicized Nor’easter that bulleted the Northeast. It passed as storms both atmospheric and emotional eventually do, into calm, leaving me and a close girlfriend with a week end of relaxation. Long, unwinding conversations, long walks with our dogs (three between us) and long, cozy mornings sleeping in. It was just what we both needed.
I hope you got what you needed from summer’s start, too.
Many of you wrote in with recommendations on what you’re devouring this summer, so we have a capacious offering. Personally, I am jumping on the top one listed below - the one from the CRUSH Readers who aspire to be cult leaders but “lack the social skills“ which surprises me, since I found their recommendation quite compelling. It’s something I would have never considered watching before, but now somehow can’t live without. Thank you Harry! (I think.)
One thing that surprised me a little? Nobody wrote in about the new Mark Twain biography by Ron Chernow. Is anybody reading it?
Enjoy! And thanks to all who shared their favorites.
In This Letter. +CRUSH Vintage Tease. +DEVOUR {things to watch, read, and listen to} CRUSH Reader Recommendations +Social Media I Loved This Week. +Our Song of the Week We’ll make the mundane our masterpiece
In last week’s letter, I shared how an unexpected dinner in New Zealand turned into a bit of a style awakening — thanks to none other than Kelly Slater, the GOAT of surfing (and a strong contender for the title of quietly coolest man alive). I wrote about it here. (Also scroll down to see it below in “Some Past Articles.”)
Slater got me thinking about doing a Summer Men’s Style Letter. We’ve gotten some great rec’s from CRUSH Readers for that already. I swear, some of you are the absolute-fucking-coolest! (If you want the site for ordering the best Japanese jeans from Paris, for instance, stay tuned.) But I’m giving those of you who hadn’t seen our call out another shot at sharing yours below. (Not everybody has to be that cool! Basics rock, and we need them.) We are looking for anything related to men’s styling - glasses/sunglasses, other accessories, t-shirts, other clothing, sneakers. Brands or specific items. This is turning into something useful. Thanks!
A SUMMER THING: Vintage Tease.
To celebrate summer, let’s try a new thing where we send in a shot of our favorite vintage t-shirt, shall we? From a concert, your favorite team, the memorable bar where that hot guy/girl got you off? Tell us something about it - like, what’s the story behind it? What makes it your favorite? We will run this column every Saturday, or as long as we get your tee’s.
I’ll start.
My Favorite Tee. from Dish
Why I Love It. Before I had my pup Koko, I had Rikki. I really miss her. I mean, I continue to yearn for the reassuring feel of her long body leaning against my right leg as I read. It was a fluke that I ended up with her at all.
I used to spend a lot of time in Jackson Hole, Wyoming and probably for that reason the Instagram account for SVALINN, a dog breeder and trainer that used to be based in Jackson Hole, kept showing up. I fell in love with a puppy that they shared a lot of snaps of and, well, one thing led to another. By the time I decided I couldn’t live without her, SVALINN had moved to Livingston, Montana and Lola (my existing dog) and I were on a flight to meet Rikki.
They gave me this t-shirt on my second trip out to Montana, to take her home. Rikki passed away last fall, but my love for her hasn’t faded a bit. Neither has the t-shirt I got when she walked into my life, even though it’s my favorite and I’ve been wearing it everywhere for years.
I feel Rikki’s strength and warmth when I wear it. God, I loved that dog.
DEVOUR {things to watch, read, and listen to}
In our periodic DEVOUR column CRUSH Readers share all the things that they think you should eat up.
Thanks to all the Readers who sent their recommendations in.
If you've devoured something we should know about, it’s not too late. We’ll get it in a future Letter. Share it here!
Things to Watch
From Harry. Daughters of the Cult (Hulu) - aka The Mormon Manson. My beloved and I like cult documentaries generally. (We aspire to be cult leaders but lack the people skills.) This series is mind blowing, even for the genre. W...T...F!!! The usual family values: sex, murder, end-of-times fanaticism, faith, hope, mind-control, polygamy, organized-crime, forgiveness, compassion, smuggling, redemption, togetherness, dumpster-diving…
From Louise. Finding Edna Lewis. This is a disarmingly moving documentary about a forgotten master chef, Edna Lewis. She was the first person to introduce Southern cooking to the world, and has never gotten the credit she deserved. Not only will you learn a little about Southern cooking, you’ll take a trip through the South.
From Deirdre. Mobland, Mobland, Mobland (Paramount). My husband and I are gripped by it. Irish gang dominating the drug trade in London. It dives into the operational aspects of Human Resources management, mob style. Occasionally one of the gang members goes on a bender and the mob boss is left to clean up the mess. It’s a gritty ride, but it’s also funny and entertaining.
From Beth. The Good Apprentice. (PBS) My husband and I found this delightful Italian series Love, intrigue and solving murders. She is a forensic medical examiner in training. So adorable. It’s Italian with English subtitles. You can find it on Prime Video. Ciao!. Love, intrigue and solving murders. She is a forensic medical examiner in training. So adorable. It’s Italian with English subtitles. You can find it on Prime Video. Ciao!
From Judy (and Sarah). Further votes for The Pitt. (HBO MAX). You mentioned this emergency room drama, Dish, so I checked it out and HOLY CRAP it’s addictive. I worry that CRUSH Readers might overlook this because they think ‘not yet another hospital thing,’ but don’t overlook it. It’s addictive.
From Heidi (and Sarah). Another vote for Dying for Sex (Hulu). I don’t think I would have picked up on this one unless you wrote about it, Dish. In fact, I know I wouldn’t. But I’m glad I did. I got wrapped up in this story about friendship and love, and the gracious and funny way love unfolded in all the story lines (family, romance, friendship) in the face of death.
Things to Read
From Diane, Nina, Sarah (and many others). The Tell by Amy Griffin.
This is a memoir about childhood abuse and how MDMA has helped Griffin heal. It is interesting and brave, and a fast read.
From Ken. The Highest Calling: Conversations on the American Presidency by David Rubenstein. In this book, Rubinstein has interviewed a number of relevant sources like historians, journalists, and living presidents, to ask them probing questions about our country’s past presidents and life in the oval office. I found it very interesting because it sheds a lot of light on the presidency as an office, as well as individual presidents, and it is not academic in tone. It is conversational and fun and enlightening.
Another one from Ken. Rise and Kill First by Ronen Bergman. This came out in 2018, but somehow I just read it. Astonishing look inside the Mossad, the Israeli Defense Force’s assassination unit. It reads like a Tom Clancy novel, but it is evidently true, or at least it is written by an Israeli journalist trying to get at the truth and it is based on tons of secret interviews up and down the chain of command. Although, to be clear, the truth is very much in dispute since so much of it is classified. The point is, it’s as close as we’re going to get and it is jarring and fascinating.
From Lacy. Still Life by Sarah Winman. It’s hard to describe this sweeping postwar novel, set in Florence and London. It’s a lot of little stories, really, and it is about love and loss and art! And when I say ‘love story’ I mean love in all its forms. It came out to raves in 2021, but I just got around to it.
From Mary. Peggy by Rebecca Godfrey. A terrific historical novel about Peggy Guggenheim, the eccentric art collector with a museum dedicated to her in Venice, Italy. What a life! Starting with the loss of her father on the Titanic, then veering through her periods in New York And Paris, her loves, losses and beloved dogs.
From Nancy. Into the Magic Shop by James Doty. This is a brilliant book written by a neurosurgeon. It’s about the mysteries of the brain and the heart and his journey to wrestle with his past trauma. It was a huge hit when it came out years ago and it has really helped me to understand some of the ways my mind and heart work (or don’t) in my life.
From Sarah. Careless People: A Cautionary Tale of Power, Greed and Lost Idealism by Sarah-Wynn-Williams. This is about Facebook!
Things to do
From Tom. Terry Real (not literally devouring him, actually). I saw your mention of Terry Real in last Saturday’s Letter and I thought I’d mention that if you go to his website you can find therapists trained by him who practice in his unorthodox style — meaning, they don’t just say “and how did that make you feel?” They actually coach and give advice. I did this. I found a therapist who had been through his training to talk with me and my wife, and it’s been very helpful. It’s not always easy (therapy), but it is making a real difference and unlike psychoanalysis (which I tried earlier in my life) we don’t have to do it for eons to see results.
From Tim. Another vote for padel! Thanks for recommending this new sport. A number of friends had mentioned it, and then I also read about it in The Crush Letter and it was that that got me out and trying it. It’s so fun I hardly realize I am breaking a sweat. And my padel club runs a lot of mixed clinics, so it has been a nice way to hang out with and meet some women. Nothing has amounted to a “date” yet, but maybe someday. Anyway, I just like having something to do that is social and not just “with the guys.”
From Wendy. The 10 Must-See Paintings at the Frick Collection. I loved your piece on visiting Manhattan’s Upper East Side, Dish. After going to the Frick, though (thank you!), I came across this article about the 10 paintings to find when going through the museum. I have to say, even though the Frick is not a large, overwhelming museum like the Met or the Louvre, it would be really nice to go in with a plan. I think I’ll go back and use this one. (This is from Airmail and behind a paywall but you can put your email in for a free read, I think.)
PS: Here’s Dish’s ROAM on the Upper East Side.
Want to load up further? Take another look through these.
Dish Stanley
Crush PoV
Crush PoV
Dish Stanley
Social Media I Loved This Week
Song of the Week
Ordinary by Alex Warren
I have done a little bit of research on predictions for the ‘Song of the Summer 2025’ and Alex Warren’s song Ordinary is on most lists. It’s one man’s anthem to love — love as sanctuary.
For whatever reason, summer seems to find me doing a lot of reading and watching. Indoor sports! Perhaps it is just the relaxed feel or perhaps it is the desire to escape, or to indulge, but whatever the reason I do a serious bit of balancing out my outdoor pursuits with reading, watching and cooking.
I trust you’ll pick up something useful from these rec’s from fellow CRUSH Readers. They are a great bunch of smart folks.
And don’t forget to send us a pic of your favorite vintage tee! I’m so excited about this new summer thing of ours.
XO,
Dish
Some Past Articles You Don't Want To Miss:
Dish Stanley
Dish Stanley
Dish Stanley
If you love me as much as I love you (and I really do love you!), then please help me grow by forwarding this {love} Letter to a friend! And I'd love to have you join us on instagram.
The Crush Letter
The Crush Letter is a weekly newsletter from Dish Stanley curating articles & intelligence on everything love & connection - friendship, romance, self-love, sex. If you’d like to take a look at some of our best stories go to Read Us. Want the Dish?
