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Hello Crush,
Happy Fourth, CRUSHes.
To send you off for the long weekend we’re re-sharing your recent favorite stories.
But first I’d like to introduce you to SuitShop, the CRUSH Letter’s First Sponsor!

Welcome, SuitShop.




When asking for CRUSH Readers to give their recommendations for the Men’s Summer Style series we’ve been running, CRUSH Reader Craig wrote in to say that he’s a major client of the line of suits and tuxes from the SuitShop.
“I don’t wear a suit or tux often enough to break the bank on them. It wouldn’t amortize. I get invited to a friend’s kid’s wedding, or an occasional professional or charity event. I maybe wear a tux once a year, a suit three or four times. When I do, I want to look good, though. I get a million compliments in SuitShop. Nobody can tell that I’m not wearing something that cost 5X more. Maybe it helps that these events are often low-lighting. Just kidding. I’ve recommended it to a million friends, and they love it too. I’ve also bought suits for my son. A recent college graduate, he’s needed them for interviews, weddings and events.” Craig
I happen to know SuitShop well and reached out to its founders who agreed to be The CRUSH Letter‘s first sponsor.
SuitShop was founded by Jeanne Foley and Diana Ganz after Jeanne’s disappointing experience with her husband’s rented wedding suit. With Jeanne’s background in fashion design (for the likes of Vera Wang) and Diana’s MBA from MIT, these two childhood friends decided to offer better suits for men and women at reasonable prices in a range of colors, styles and sizing.

I know it’s summer now, but fall/winter will be here in no time, so it’s not too early to order suits and tuxes for this fall and winter. Last year I had come across Alyson Walsh’s That’s Not My Age blog post “The Versatile Velvet Jacket” and decided I needed to add one to my wardrobe. Like Alyson suggested, I ended up wearing it to every holiday party I went to, as well as for meeting friends for drinks or dinner. I wore it with jeans, with leather pants, with a silk blouse underneath or without anything.

Below are the SuitShop versions that I bought for my nephew and me last year. I got the black velvet peak label jacket ($299) for him as a Christmas/birthday gift and the women’s version ($299) for me. (No, we didn’t attend anything together in our coordinated velvet jackets.)
Your Favorite Reads from The CRUSH Letter Lately
For the long week end we’re resharing the stories CRUSH Readers read the most.

Love Is Terribly Inconvenient. My Ex Alexander & My New Pup Koko. By Dish Stanley
In which Dish reminisces about a favorite ex as she falls hard for a King Charles Cavalier with infuriatingly large, beautiful brown eyes.
“Love is a rapturous gift. Terribly inconvenient, though.” - Alexander (one of Dish’s favorite ex’s).
I met Alexander years ago, when the Gramercy Park Hotel in New York was still in business, and still a moderately cool place for people to host things. We were at a party on the hotel’s terrace on an unseasonably warm spring night. A night thick with air that held the promise of summer.
We had a brief but memorable conversation about Joan Didion (we had both recently watched Griffin Dunne’s documentary Joan Didion: The Center Will Not Hold — (he liked it more than I). A bit later, as I was heading for the door, he asked if he could take me out to dinner.
"Oh, thank you," I replied. "I’m hiding under a rock, though. Had a horrible break-up. You know, all that," I said sweeping my arm across the room toward the New York City skyline outside in a gesture meant to encapsulate the big messiness of life.
Continue reading here


Willing.“The Art of War: Diane and Quick Rick” by Lisa Ellex
Willing is our ongoing series about dating at this stage. It’s so complicated. We’ve got emotional scar tissue from umpteen years of living and loving and loss. We’ve got nerves. We’ve got the practical obstacles of baked-in structures and demands, familial and geographic. Too often, we just can’t break through. But then sometimes we do.
Diane is a 60-something-year old retired marketing analyst living with her husband in the northeast suburbs.
After the breakup of our 6-year live-in relationship, neither my ex nor I could afford the apartment we shared in the up-and-coming New Jersey neighborhood we loved so much. As if breakups weren't hard enough, we were both suddenly saddled with the daunting task of finding a new place to live. To add to our angst, we had to find a way to amicably divide between us the six years of furniture, kitchen items, books, bedding, and bric-a-brac that made our house a home.
My ex had an easier time finding a place, as he earned more money than I did. Just as I was beginning to lose hope, a couple of friends from the neighborhood knew of an apartment in their adjacent sister building. It was within my budget, kept me in the neighborhood, and was just a short commute to my job in Manhattan. Though the breakup was difficult, the move was easy and decorating a new place was a good distraction for me. As I was unpacking some things one night, I discovered that my ex’s copy of Sun Tzu’s The Art of War had somehow found its way into my box of books. I opened the book, gave it a good sniff (doesn’t everyone do that?) and, in my vulnerable state, began leafing through the pages when a particular sentence caught my eye: “Appear weak when you are strong, and strong when you are weak.” The timing was perfect.
Continue reading here


PrimeCrush Toy Tester Review. Here’s Susie’s Take on the Wired’s Top Pick for a Vibrator
We’ve heard a lot (from our Readers and others) about the vibrator that the NYT’s review column Wired says is the best out there. We think you want to know what CRUSH Reader Susie has to say about it. Thank you, Susie!
We noted (and many of you, dear CRUSH Readers, sent us) the NYT Wired piece on wand vibrators. Not for nothing, but their overall best pick, The Hitachi Magic Wand (Rechargeable), is a vibrator that we had sent out to a few of our toy testers almost two years ago. When we sought their reviews, we heard bupkus back. Nothing.
Our PrimeCrush Toy Tester Reviewers are quick to fill out reviews for things they love, as well as hate. But the things they’re ‘whatever’ over they just don’t get around to reviewing. When we pressed again after reading it was the top pick of Wired’s team, we eventually got some brief responses back that varied from “meh,” to “yeah, no.”
Continue reading here


Roam Reports: Lima, Cuzco, Cartagena, Merida. By CRUSH Reader Patrick
A recurring column where CRUSH Readers share a snapshot of where they’ve been and what they loved there.
Patrick, tell us a little bit about you..
New Yorker, culture nerd, hispanophile and overall bon vivant, I'm passionate about exploring destinations that blend rich culture, history and culinary delights. When I travel (which I do often) I usually aim for extreme value within what’s usually considered a “splurge” experience (I.e. hidden gem top restaurants or using points to fly lie-flat business class abroad). While I focus my travels on history and local character — and thus, adore stylish boutique hotels— I don’t hesitate to stay in chains that offer modern conveniences and are well-located. [I appreciate finding gems that offer value (in location, experience, quality), but I don’t hesitate to splurge where it’s worth it. And while I prefer to stay someplace stylish with character, I don’t hesitate to stay in chains that offer modern conveniences and are well-located, especially if I can use my points.
Continue reading here


Dermaplane or Nano-Needle Your Way to Baby Soft Skin by Lauren Weinstein
Wondering about these procedures? Here’s the point.
There is something universally satisfying and smile-inducing about caressing a baby’s cheek. It’s difficult to imagine that our now mature skin once felt so bouncy and velvety soft. What if your skin could feel that way again? Though we can’t turn back the hands of time, we can achieve a brighter, smoother complexion with dermaplaning and/or Nano needling.
Thankfully, we have options, albeit temporary, to recreate that magical feeling for our own skin. Dermaplaning is a minimally invasive cosmetic procedure that is used to treat a variety of skin conditions. It can improve skin texture and tone, reduce the appearance of fine lines, acne scars and allows for better product absorption. It also removes the vellus hairs (peach fuzz) and don’t panic, you will not transform into the Bearded Lady from the circus. The hair will not grow back thicker or darker, since it’s not altering the hair follicle. Initially, you might feel that the growth is coarser due to the blunt cut from the procedure but as it grows back to its original shape, it will soften.
Continue reading here


PrimeCrush & Chill: Grown Up Love Stories Worth A Rewatch By Christian Pan
Christian Pan is a writer based in New York City. Since 2021, he has published sixteen novellas and over a hundred short stories exploring the erotic imagination. In addition to book & film reviews, he hosts the Pulse Session for the monthly podcast All the Filthy Details, and is a founding author of TheoReads.
PrimeCrush & Chill: Grown Up Love Stories Worth A Re-Watch: Enough Said By Christian Pan
Starring: Julia Louis-Dreyfus, James Gandolfini, Catherine Keener, Toni Colette Released: September 18, 2013 (USA)
Basic Plot: While attending a party with some friends, middle-aged massage therapist Eva books a well-known and successful poet as a new client, as well as meets an attractive single man that she begins dating. Her budding romance is jeopardized, however, when Eva realizes that her new client is the ex-wife of her boyfriend.
Summary: Massage therapist Eva (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) hopes to find a new relationship in her life before her daughter Ellen (Tracy Fairaway) goes away to college in the fall. While at a party with her friends Sarah (Toni Collette) and Will (Ben Falcone), Eva gets introduced to two people that will prove important in her life: the wealthy new-agey poet Marianne (Catherine Keener) and the charming, down-to-earth Albert (James Gandolfini). While initially uncertain if she has any kind of chemistry with him, Eva is quickly smitten by Albert´s humor, warmth, and clear interest in her. At the same time, Marianne not only hires Eva for regular bodywork sessions, but becomes a new friend who tends to talk negatively and often about her ex-husband. When Eva realizes that the man she keeps talking about is actually Albert, she is confused: initially, she tries to keep these two worlds far apart, yet simultaneously finds herself internalizing a lot of Marianne's biases towards her ex. Eva begins to alter her views to be more in line with the poets, trusting her own instincts and feelings of affection for him less and less. At first, Albert doesn´t understand the sudden changes in Eva´s personality, until one day he comes to Marianne´s to pick up their own college-bound daughter Tess (Eve Hewson), and discovers Eva there finishing a massage therapy session with his ex-wife. Eva does a poor job of playing dumb, and Albert immediately sees through her act; he ends their relationship, hurt and disappointed. After some weeks of no contact have passed, the two meet again, and Eva attempts to apologize to Albert for being so mean and thoughtless to him, as well as admit that she still has feelings for him.
Continue reading here


TOPIX: Just Call Me Already. By Nina Ross
Midlife is that point when we begin to realize that life is getting short. Too short to worry about what other people think. A turning point where we begin to craft the kind of friendships and romantic relationships that work for us now. TOPIX is our way of getting conversations started on what living, loving and connecting with each other really looks like in midlife now.
CRUSH Reader Nina Ross contemplates what we’ve gained and what we’ve lost by giving up the impromptu telephone call.
Where did the telephone go?
Remember the days before answering machines and caller id when the phone would ring. Who were they calling for? Was it a person trying to sell you something, or the guy who sat behind you in 8th grade algebra who you've been dreaming about? If it is, what will you say?
It never occurred to us not to answer the phone just because we didn't know who it would be. If we did, we could lose that point of connection forever. Without a trace. So we answered it with a hello, not knowing who it would be, what they might want or how it would make us feel.
Where did that go? Now we text before we call or maybe we don't call at all, only text. We pre-announce ourselves, "Is it ok if I call? Are you free?" We act as if we don't have license to just reach out and say, aloud, "I'm thinking of you." Or, "Hey, I'd really like to talk." That feeling of the phone ringing, and it could be anyone....is lost.
Continue reading here

Enjoy your long summer week end, CRUSHes. We’ll see you next Saturday.
XO,
Dish

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The Crush Letter
The Crush Letter is a weekly newsletter from Dish Stanley curating articles & intelligence on everything love & connection - friendship, romance, self-love, sex. If you’d like to take a look at some of our best stories go to Read Us. Want the Dish?