TREATS: A Sex Toy Tester Update (& Preview).  By Dish Stanley

TREATS: A Sex Toy Tester Update (& Preview). By Dish Stanley

. 4 min read

I hear you.  The single most recurring request I get from CRUSH Readers is for more recommendations on sex toys, products, techniques, sites and information.  Honest, independent reviews on things CRUSH Readers might want to try from the CRUSH community.  This was true when I published the first product recommendation, on the suction vibrator that Dame Products sold out of shortly after its launch (reprint below), and then again when I wrote about arousal gels (reprint below).  After I published the article a few weeks ago Field Trip: What Five Midlife Couples Learned On One Powerful Weekend Away With A Sex & Relationship Therapist, I got more.

I really like learning about sex products and experiences because "it is out of my comfort zone, but reading about in The Crush Letter makes me think that maybe it shouldn't be."

It's a big reason I'm here writing The Crush Letter, focusing on providing the information on relational well-being that CRUSH Readers want. In the Five Midlife Couples article one of the (long-married) retreat participants said that it was at the urging of sex and relationship therapist Dr. Jess that she and her husband tried sex toys.  Changing things up, doing new things, having a laugh over it (even if it doesn't work), has become such a fun way for she and her husband to be close, she said.

To that end, PrimeCrush has launched its Sex Toy Tester group.  We have over a dozen volunteers, solo and partnered up, who will be testing a wide range of toys, books, props, lubes and apps (etc) and then (confidentially) letting us know what we might want to try.  They will be getting their first box in November, and we will be reporting back to you in December.

It's not toooo long to wait, but to hold you over here are some sex toys, products, and tips we’ve already shared some quick takes on.  (By the way, we don’t get any affiliate fees or other compensation, we just honestly enjoy these:-0).

Arousal Gels, Babe. Arousal gels for women have been piling into my ad space lately, so I ordered three from natural brands I trust: Dame Products, Simple Jane, and Foria. They all feel good (not at the same time!), amplified the feels, made me tingle, heightened the experience, and felt more "organic" than a lot of lubricants.  Here's my quick take: I like them all, but Temptress from Simple Jane and Awaken from Foria both have CBD in their formulas (maybe I imagined it, but I felt calmer and more open, and I really liked that).  Temptress (with CBD) has a spicy/clove smell that I wouldn't pick for a beach vacation but is great for a cold night (and, let's be real, it also has the best name). Foria's Awaken (with CBD) had a subtler taste and smell (and I preferred that on a warm night) (and Foria has a version called Pleasure that also has THC in it, which I'd like to try but couldn't get). Dame Product's straightforwardly named Arousal Serum had the most tingle, my favorite smell and taste (mildly minty) and is the least expensive (and if you prefer it without CBD, this may be your pick). Pro Tips for all of them: start with a very small amount because the sensations can be strong. And they might take a few minutes to rev up (especially the CBD products).  Arousal gels are distinct from lubricant, and don't replace lube.  It's kind of wonderful to try them at the same time, tbh.

Literal Good Vibrations. Dame Products has been making sex toys for women (by women) since 2014, so we expect good moves from them. But under the heading, "T.M.I." a reviewer in Refinery29 says that Dame’s just-released latest, a suction vibrator, made her feel like she was getting oral play from a cloud. (The review itself was pretty exciting, truth be told.) “Dame's Suction Vibrator Feels Like Getting Oral From A Cloud". And if this toy sounds maybe a little too advanced, depending on how far along you are in your toy journey (not judging here), it might make sense to first dip into this seminal piece by Liza Lentini, Features Editor at perennially hip rock mag Spin. “The Sex Files: A Crash Course in Sex Toys

Traveling with sex toys. A few pro tips for traveling with your toys:  go small with the toys (for instance, I wear this, bring this and know guys who don't travel without this "it's f*cking fabulous, Dish!"; wrap/pack up your toys in separate silk bags or stash them in this (so they don't go off!);  to get around the 3.4-ounce liquid size limits plan in advance by stocking up on these lube packs; do NOT pack your toys in your carry-on - they will disappear! (TSA evidently only hires people who want to try your toys!); and - most importantly - if you do find yourself standing in front of TSA security while they rifle through your silk bag of sex toys, there is only one way of handling it.  Look them straight in the eye, shrug, and say "Yeah, it's going to be a good trip.  I've got a handle on it (wink.)."

The Crush Letter
The Crush Letter is a weekly newsletter curated by Dish Stanley on everything love & connection - friendship, romance, self-love, sex. If you’d like to take a look at some of our best stories go to Read Us. Want the Dish?

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