The Crush Letter No 81

. 6 min read

I'm Dish and I write a weekly newsletter about friendship, love and sex in midlife.  Because midlife is so much hotter than they said it would be.  Hell yes, sign me up for the Dish.

Hello Crush,

Happy Saturday!

Let's get right to it. Two things: we have an upcoming Letter focused on being single in midlife and we are looking for CRUSH Readers willing to be interviewed. Whether you are solo as a lifestyle choice, or by chance (and temporarily), we'd love to speak with you. Up for it? Write me at Dish@PrimeCrush.com

Secondly, I'm starting "a midlife kit." It's more figurative than literal, but it's a variation on the "what I wish I had known I would need" theme. It's how we equip ourselves for this thing we're doing (like it or not). Scroll down to see my first quick take. But I'm building it. What should I add? What do you wish you had? Write me Dish@PirmeCrush.com.

Thanks - we've got a lot of good stuff for you this week, including TOPIX! Enjoy!


If you're new here (welcome!), I'm Dish, the Master of Ceremonies. For more about me and why we're here go here.


In This Letter.  +TOPIX. “I Vant To [Sleep] Alone.” By A.K.A. Darla it’s been reported that separate quarters make for peace between the couple   +Sexual Healing. Seriously…What’s Sexier Than The Sun? By Liza L   You might describe someone like this: “they’re so warm” or “they just glow.”   +What You’ll Need: Midlife Kit (Pt 1) A good book on how to handle grief   +Social Media I Loved This Week. By Dish Stanley   +Our Song of the Week Very superstitious, Nothin' more to say


Topix.

Let’s Admit There’s No “Normal” to Relationships in Midlife & Start Talking About What We’re Really Doing. True Stories on How We're Doing It.

“I Vant To [Sleep] Alone.”  By A.K.A. Darla

The Queen and Prince Philip did it for years.  So did Helen Bonham Carter and Tim Burton. Even the U.K’s sexiest couple, David and Victoria Beckham, have “his and her wings.” Yes, like that number one hit from Barbara Mandrall, these couples are “sleeping single in a double bed.”

I thought perhaps it was just a “Brit” thing, until learning that Ryan O'Neal said he and Farrah Fawcett slept apart because they valued their privacy. In the case of Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick, it’s been reported that separate quarters make for peace between the couple as Broderick’s haphazard housekeeping is an assault on Parker's orderly aesthetic.

Growing up in a Greenwich Village neighborhood where the luxury of an extra bedroom was unheard of, I was shocked when I visited the Upper West Side apartment of a high school classmate who, when giving me a tour of the place, pointed out the separate bedrooms of her parents. Outside of Lucy and Ricky Ricardo, it was the first time I had heard of married couples not sleeping in the same bed.  In the case of the Ricardo’s, my pre-adolescent self assumed their separate beds were to ensure that Lucy would not be disturbed when Ricky came home late from working at The Tropicana. Perhaps Lucy and Ricky were ahead of their time as it seems more and more couples – especially those entering second marriages – are opting for separate sleeping spaces.

Continue reading here.

Sexual Healing. By Liza L

In this ongoing series, our resident Reiki Master Teacher shows us that it’s so easy to offer yourself much-needed comfort when you need it.

Seriously…What’s Sexier Than The Sun?

Balancing your Solar Chakra will bring you the confidence you need, whenever you need it.

Here’s the thing about the sun. We know that it’s a star that rises and sets. We acknowledge what it does for our plants and heart and spirit (and so much more). We like the feeling of the sun when it hits our face. We rely on the sun to make our days brighter and warmer.

Truly, what is more powerful than the sun?

In energy healing, we acknowledge that the sun in the sky is a daily blessing, but the real sun is within all of us.

Your third chakra is your Solar Chakra, located, appropriately in your solar plexus (it’s sometimes called the Solar Plexus Chakra), above your belly button.

Ever met someone who was “pure sunshine”? There’s a good chance their Solar Chakra is in healthy balance. You might describe someone like this: “they’re so warm” or “they just glow.” They may exude confidence or have a smile that lights the room. Everything seems easy for them, they know what they want and they usually get it.

All chakras are their healthiest when they are open and in balance. When the Solar Chakra is out of balance, it may show up in these ways: eating disorders, digestive/bowel disorders, stomach problems and aches, and lack or nutrition. Solar Chakra imbalance is also associated with low libido and sexual dysfunction, as well as depression and anxiety. Those who are narcissistic and have low self-confidence may have a Solar Chakra imbalance.

Continue reading here.

What You’ll Need: Midlife Kit (Pt 1)

  • 25.36 oz bottle of Tequila
  • Good lube
  • Hair defuser/trimmer for nose, chin, ears, etc.
  • A good book on how to handle grief
  • A subscription to PrimeCrush
  • A sense of humor
  • Truly great friends who are very forgiving

Social Media I Loved This Week.  By Dish Stanley

@Vulture on Instagram  Watch it here. A dream episode of The Cher Show from 1975. Cher singing (and dancing to) one of the big hits of the decade Superstition with the Osmonds. It's groovy.

#OpenYourWorld. Heineken Ad. If you haven't seen this yet, it's a must. It is not trying for nuance, it's trying for straight-up let's get people to start talking with those they see as "others." It straight-up works at getting us going.

Song of the Week

Superstition By Stevie Wonder

Superstition by Stevie Wonder

Dish Stanley XO,
Dish

You Won't Want to Miss A Thing. Here Are Links to Some Favorites.

+Transitions. By Lisa Ellex ‘Transitions’ is a new series where we address the all-important issue of redirecting our lives at this midlife stage. In the first of the series, PrimeCrush writer Lisa Ellex broaches the question of what it takes to do it all alone.

+I Redesigned My Closet for My Midlife Lifestyle: Here’s What Happened.  By Daisy Foster

+5 Things That Turn Me On: Hilary H. What turns you on?  We'd love to hear from you! (Yes, you!) If you’d like us to send you a template to fill out, it’s really easy and fun, please email me at dish@primecrush.com. You must be a CRUSH Reader! (PS you can publish under your alias.)





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